Extra Special Ed

Top 5 reasons why I love our school’s special ed class:

1) regardless how many times a day I get “miss….” and one of my own kids forgetting my name, the entire “sped” class recognizes me and the ones that can speak say my name right almost every time

2) Every day at 8:15am, they do “What day is today?” and discuss “What was yesterday? what was the weather? what’s tomorrow.”  On Mondays and Tuesdays, they all say “MONDAY BLECH” (or tuesday).  On Wednesdays and Thursdays it’s “Meh” and Fridays they all have a mini dance party.

3) They are SOOO HAPPY TO SEE ME!  I see “sweet T” in the hall and she squeals and stamps her feet and runs to me every time saying “HEY GIRLFRIEND! No YOU look beautiful today!”

4) They go to regular classes to say the pledge of allegiance with other students.  It all comes out as “BAH BAH BLU BLAH BOO” but they put their hand over their heart and give the most allegiance to that flag of ANYONE.

5) They wander.  Every single one is an escape artist.  If the door isn’t locked, they try to sneak out down the hall to see other teachers.

October

I opened WordPress to blog for the first time since being married.  I felt a need to include a timeline to give an adequate introduction to this momentous event.  I look up at the calendar and realize it’s been 3 months to the day that Tom and I have been married.  (So I look over to him, both of us having forgot the event, and say “ummm happy month-iversary!” to be received with “oh yeah! you beat me this time!”)

Tom and I have never had a very good sense of remembering dates.  On our two year dating anniversary, neither one of us remembered until 11:00 that night.  We normally look to forgetting as a good thing, meaning neither one of us have stressed over a calendar all day and haven’t seen the numbers to remind us.

So over the last 3 months a few facts:
*Tom can’t eat crab bisque and got sick our first night on the honeymoon.
*We got a BANGING tv which has given me ample opportunity to learn more about the wonderful sport that is football.  It’s a lot of  me not knowing any players’ names, and on one occasion, actually crying because Jeff Reid (just looked up his name) looked so sad missing a field goal kick.
* I CAN COOK!!! holy smokes… it’s not anything exquisite, but all edible.  I think I’m actually thankful that Tom’s a picky eater.  Only knowing how to took 6 things totally works for a guy that’s used to microwave pizza 5 nights a week in college.
* Tom really is happy just sitting around watching football all day.
* I sleep with the light on most nights and one of those cheesy masks so that it feels like Tom’s coming to bed soon, when really he’s up til 2 studying.
*  I’m looking a new job for next year.  I love my children and I love my school, but it’s just too far for both of us to commute.
* We bought Super Mario World for Wii and have almost beaten it.  Neither Tom nor I had much a videogame childhood so now we’re making up for lost time.
* You can never have too many bookcases.
and for the PG13 section:
* Sex is awesome

5 : 15

One full week and 3 days left with my children (and a week and a half of paperwork after that).  I ended up having only 5 students fail the End of Grade Test.  This doesn’t seem like a huge deal, but I’m STOKED.  I had 3 kids with perfect scores and so many kids’ scores improved from last year.  The best part of the week was having around 15 kids say “Ms. Godwin, did you see what I got? I wouldn’t have done that without you.”  I could have cried.  Almost did.  So if anyone can please re-encourage Tom that I have enough children for now… enough emotions poured into them, and he can stop cringing at my jokes.  I really just want a puppy

healthy

so girls are tormented from childhood about how they should look.

guys reading this are going “still don’t get it…”

girls reading this are like “hear this all the time… not a chance I’ll hear anything new.”  And you’re right.  But there comes a point where some truth gets through.

A book I recently read forces me to ask “what’s the wise thing to do?”  And the wise thing for me to do is for me to exercise… my spirit, my body, my mind.  The wise thing for me to do is to only indulge in things God would be proud of.  The wise thing to do is to invest in the priorities I claim to have: God, Family, Health, Work… with Family defined as Tom, my actual blood relation, and my friends who I look to like my family.

I’m thinking that for me to be healthy in eating, I have to quit giving my attention to my weight and my attention to “the next right thing.”  God will take care of the rest.

I’m trying to not oversimplify, but recently that’s a lot healthier for me than my usual over-thinking.

P.S. Carolina lost… I’m not talking about it.  Seems like the healthy thing to do.

ILT

ILT stands for Initially License Teacher… which is my new identity in the world of education.  It means 0 vacation days for 3 years and, to compensate, about 6 hours of extra work a day.  I went through BTI and am still continuing M&Ms.  I have 1 student with an IEP, about 5 students with a 504, and when I return on Monday, I determine how many students I have to make PEPs for.  The answer is: A lot.  And of course, thanks to NCLB, I’m stressing about EOGs already and it’s only September.  All of my professors always told me that we truly would learn all of the terms in teaching… all of the lingo.  I thought they were wrong, but turns out I did.  I got thrown into it, expected to know it, and so I learned.

And for those of you who have been asking and are praying, that’s how my first year teaching is going.  The first two weeks were really rough.  Everyone said it would start out hard but it would get better and I kept thinking, “not a chance.  I’ll either love it right off or I’ll hate it.  Sure there will be extra work, but no.  I’m different.  It’ll be easier for me.”  But they were right.  It started out hard.  But it truly is getting better.  This week I only called to wake up Tom in panic about my job once on the way to school.  The weeks before it was a solid 3 days (and you wonder why the poor guy is sick).  This coming week, knowing Tom’s waiting for me at the end of it, I’m going for zero.  Because I love my job.  I hate my job… a LOT.  But I love my job, too.  It’s kindof like two siblings in Middle School.  They hate each other… they act on that hatred by screaming to mom and dad tattling about the terrible thing one said to the other… by harassing each other when they’re trying to talk on the phone.  I mean this job is taking over my entire life and butting in where it doesn’t belong.  It’s this huge battle in my head when I leave work to just TRY and think about something else.

But there is that time where the older sibling gets in a fight with some kid at school b/c the kid made fun of his younger sister.  And in that moment, the kid and his sister love each other.  I have those few kids who I’m fighting for with everything I have, and they’re starting to get it.  They are doing well in class, and behaving more, and… well… they make me love my job.  Just for a moment.  But for now, that’s enough.  It’s still early on.  If I can love my job just a couple moments a week, eventually that will grow, I think.

So thank you to all who care about me and are praying for me.  I can see it working.  I’m still overwhelmed.  I’m still just getting by, but the way God is pushing me along… I know I’m not alone in this.

character Ed.

So I listen to Mike’s sermons on the way to and from school.  It kind of motivates me and gets my mind on the right track when I go into the building.  So this morning I was listening to Week 3 of the Moments series and I’m trying to figure out a way to pass this… brilliance… onto my middle schoolers.

Those of you who know me know these two facts about driving: 1) I hate it.  2) I suck at it.  So I’m praying that I don’t wreck as I drive down the road taking notes on my center console about how I’m going to “edumacate” these kids in life-lessons.  Well they have homeroom every day for a half hour.  Two of those days they have “Character Education” which most of the teachers HATE those days and just come up with busy work for the kids or make it a study hall… which I TOTALLY did at my last school.  But this morning… I was inspired.

I’m contemplating doing a “Series” for my Character Ed days with my homeroom and start a continual “Appreciation” project.  Each week during the class, we’re going to talk about ways that we can appreciate ourselves instead of depreciate ourselves.  There will be a whole day where it’s just finances… things that have depreciation value… why they do… things that appreciate over time… things that took slight appreciation value and dropped suddenly (like beanie babies).  We can predict things that we THINK will have appreciation value that is coming out.  Eventually we’re going to get to ways that we can appreciate ourselves and make ourselves more valuable.  This is going to require me letting go of JUST the right amount of personal stuff.  Too much and they lose respect and think I’m their friend.  Not enough and I’m just someone else who is telling them how terrible they are and how they should stop making mistakes.

I’m terrified… because it’s SOOO going to fail.  But I’m totally going down swinging.  Even if they think I’m the weird caring teacher… at least caring is in there.  I’m never going to fail gracefully… but it’s like Mike was saying… people who are successful can never define failure.  They just know that they HAVE had failures… they can’t explain what it actually MEANS to fail.

I’m supposed to define success.  My definition is very ESPNesque… giving it all I’ve got.  My former temporary roommate Haley had a sign in her bathroom saying how the day she stands before God she wants to be empty handed.  She wants to say to God “I used everything You gave me.”

When I talk about wanting to teach… it’s about showing these kids… SOMETHING.  I don’t know what… but I’m going to go at it with everything, knowing God will fill me up when I’ve poured it all out, and will put me back together better than I was before I broke into a million pieces.  Having enough faith to give it my all.

“have I told you lately that I love you?”

Well I got to see Meme tonight.  I had a fun-filled day of meetings and such, so it was nice to come back to some relaxed time with my grandma.  She gave me a blondie (like a brownie but better) and we talked for a bit and played some cards.  She told me about how she heard the song on the radio the other day “Have I Told You Lately That I love You…” and said that every time she heard the song, she remembered Big A (my grandpa) coming in from the farm in his overalls and dirty hands and saying “Rosie… turn around… c’mon turn around for a sec” and he would just burst out into the song.  She said she was always at the sink or in the kitchen doing something and he would come in the back door and make her stop what she was doing so he could sing the song to her.  She said she wanted to call the radio station and tell them the story, but she couldn’t bear the idea of hearing herself on the radio so she didn’t.

Love Meme… and it’s nice to know that my burly old Big A was a romantic

the day after

yesterday I left wilmington “for good.”  I’m coming back in three weeks to visit, then pretty consistently for every other weekend.  i think the space will be good for me and tom, so neither of us will feel guilty about feeling so guilty.  Plus it’ll show me what it’s really like to miss him, rather than little dramatic sessions I tend to have of “omg I haven’t seen you all day!”  I feel like I value him, but I think that this year will help teach me how to SHOW it a different way.

we’re not phone people… at ALL.  I mumble, he doesn’t talk, and neither of us like it against our ear, really (ok I know IIII don’t.  I’m assuming he doesn’t either considering how often I’m put on speakerphone… which is weird and echoey).  This morning’s gone pretty well though.  We’ve been chatting on and off online while he watches the olympics and rehearses for overflow and I clean/rearrange my room here.  And we’ve been facebook wrestling (you know… really VALUING the relationship like I talked about)

It’s average.  Time with my mom has been good so far and I’m already useful here.  Last night we got a call from Lifeline about a neighbor that fell in her house so I went over with my dad to (well first check her decency of clothing) and then of course help her up and back into her bed.  Plus mom’s all emotional and happy I’m home.  She brought me M&Ms and a glass of wine last night while she waited for the last load of laundry to wash and we talked about… well… lots of things.  It was pretty not-purposeful… but nice.

I talk about Tom a lot. Go figure.

houseboating

 

So every year my family (like my mom’s cousins and kids) goes on vacation in Tennessee, where they’re from.  We drive up to Dale Hollow Lake, which is right on the Kentucky/Tennessee border, and rent a houseboat and go “camping.”  As in, generator, refrig, AC, 6 bedrooms kindof deal (and a hot tub).  Yeah we’re really roughing it.  We also bring so much food and “Hatcher Family Lemonade” (spiked) it won’t fit in all the cabinets.  It’s one of those grand experiences where you gain 5 lbs each trip.  That’s when you know it’s a good vacation.

We have tube wars where we link up two tubes to the back of the boat.  Whoever is on one tube is against the other, and you jump from tube to tube trying to throw people off.  The award goes to Caroline Lee, my cousin who I babysat the past few years.  Her nickname was “the leech.”  She would jump on people, wrap both arms and legs around them, until she pulled them off of the tube face first into the 40 mph water beneath them.

I am so proud.

mandy moore and michael jackson

today’s the day to clean up at my house in Pine Level… kind of prepping for next year.  OK i’m not that organized… my mom made me come home to clean out boxes b/c we’re having people stay at our house this weekend for our family reunion.  more on that later.

but yeah i went from a nice classic selection of death cab and damien rice to highschool music.  I got in the mood to dance while i cleaned so pulled down my itunes library a little bit further to mandy moore for some top-of-the-lungs-off-key-singing to be followed by some motown dancing with the jackson 5 (go grapevine).

you would think that after a solid year and a half with tom, i would have “better” taste in music.  but no… my guilty pleasures are still pleasurable.  I think I blame it on the boogie.